Sovereign Sanctity: or, an Angel Intervenes
Before I share this story with you, I must let you know that I’m about to share the most powerful, most harrowing spiritual and physical experience of my life. I also need to let you know that I wasn’t raised a Christian, in any sense, and am not a practicing Christian in any way today. I’ve sat on this experience long enough and am now comfortable with the fact that the world needs to hear what happened to my husband and I back in the cold depths of January.
To give you some background, you should know that my husband, Isaac, and I opened up a studio space and metaphysical shop in Littleton, NH, called Deep Earth Arts. Some of you may be familiar with it, some of you may not be. We opened it in September of 2018 and it was a slow, soft beginning. At this point I’d been providing psychic readings and mediumship professionally since October of 2017, so little over a year. Isaac had also been providing his services as a shaman and Reiki healer for about as long, if not longer.
We were lucky to stumble upon a wonderful spot for our space, an area that would accommodate our services as well as the products we would like to offer. Before moving into this arena, we owned (and still own, though not to such a large extent) a marketing company. We provide social media, video, and website services to local businesses, and at this point, were balancing the two businesses. We obviously knew that we were being funneled or lead to provide our healing services and were actively balancing the business that got us there, as well as the business that our hearts were leading us to.
I began my marketing business in October of 2013, after having a horrendous job at a local radio station. While working at the radio station I was working with small businesses that didn’t really have a grasp on digital marketing, and I saw an opportunity. From that day to this one I only work with small businesses, Mom-and-Pop shops who help support and enrich the area in which we live and call home. My parents were small business owners and that’s where my heart was - helping those in need, and helping those that weren’t part of some corporate giant. I didn’t want to work with banks, car dealerships, Real Estate agencies, or anything like that.
It was only a couple of years into this business until Isaac had to quit his 40-hour-a-week job so he could help me with my marketing services, which then became our marketing business. Through all of that, Isaac had no interest in getting in front of people, either in a sales aspect or any other way. He was - and is still - great at helping in the background, and I get it: the daily grind of trying to sell yourself and your services is difficult, to say the least. One has to go through a whole lot of “No”s and rejection before one finds themself with a “Yes.” There’s a lot of pressure being an entrepreneur, and it was one that I felt like I was carrying by myself most of the time. While Isaac had faith that the Universe was providing for us (and it was) I was still the fellow that had to run around and get checks from clients so our bills could be paid.
Like I said, a lot of pressure. I was the money guy, and while it was not a role I liked playing, I was playing it nonetheless.
So please, imagine us in January, in the darkest part of the year, still trying to get our new business off the ground, all the while trying to manage our existing one and take care of our household. We have a 16-year-old son named Sequoia who is the light of our life, so we also had - and have - a family to take care of.
I talk about this pressure as a way to explain - and certainly not excuse - the mental state I was in at the time. I was providing readings to people in certain time blocks, for certain amounts of money. When I provided an hour’s reading, it was an hour’s time for X amount of dollars. Isaac was also providing his services, but being much more loose with his time than I was. If he promised a client an hour of his time it might be an hour, or it might be 90 minutes or two hours. He was so notorious for this that it was becoming a pattern, and it often caused issues with scheduling, and I was starting to speak with him about it. It was starting to bother me, greatly. I felt it was a lack of professional boundaries for him, for the client, and for me, someone who was trying to be rigid with the exchange of services I was providing.
It was a dark Friday in January, the 11th to be precise, when this incredible and awe-inspiring experience started to unfold for us. At this point in time I had been drawing a rune and Tarot card every morning. This particular Friday I pulled Fehu (the rune for resources, money, wealth) and the Devil Tarot card. Completely mystified as to why this was, I just went about my day.
Yet, I should have heeded this warning, and did not.
On this particular Friday, with our son in school, we were down to one car, the other being in the garage. Our shop closed at 5, and Isaac had a client right after the shop closed down. Our son needed to be picked up at 6:30 or so, yet Isaac didn’t finish with his client until 7 or so, which put us picking up our son at 7:30 that night. All I could see was him standing out in the cold of winter, just because Isaac couldn’t manage his time.
And I just lost it. All the pressure of running two businesses at that point coalesced into what I can only describe as a nervous breakdown. After Isaac was done with his client and climbed into the car, I unloaded on him all the way to pick up our son, and it didn’t end when we got home. All of the pressure I’d been holding in, all of my frustrations with him and our life, completely poured out of me in an unfair and awful torrent of yelling and accusations. It was such a horrendous experience it felt like I was on a drug. I felt out of my mind.
That was Friday night, and we had a day at the shop on Saturday. Things were tense between us, as is usually the case between couples when they have a big blow out, but this time there was something different about it. I can’t say that this experience would have broken us as a couple but if our lives hadn’t played out the way they were about to, I can safely say we would never have been the same. Saturday came and went and it was tense between us, but we made it through to Sunday.
Then Sunday came, the 13th. I had some readings, the shop was open, and Isaac had a client that afternoon when the shop closed at 4 pm. When the shop closed down, I headed out (in our single vehicle) to pick up our son from spending time at his Mom’s. I took him home and headed down to the basement to start the woodstove, and once that was going, I headed back out to pick up Isaac after he was done with his client. We live about twenty minutes drive away from our shop.
As soon as I got into the car and started to drive up our driveway, it hit me. This was when this experience that I refer to as the most powerful physical and spiritual experience I’ve ever happened began.
All of a sudden I saw the rune and Tarot card pull from that Friday - essentially meaning money is the devil. Then, I was filled with what I can only call electricity, the most powerful energy I’ve ever felt. To this day I can’t accurately describe it. My body was filled with an incredible energy - and message - that to this day I hope I don’t have to go through again.
As I do my work in speaking with spirits I will receive impressions and sensations, tastes, smells, and feelings. I will often hear complete sentences and phrases in my head. This experience, as I was driving up my snow-covered driveway and over the snowy dirt roads upon which I live, was very clear. I was communicated with in very clear words and phrases, and more importantly, the who of what was communicating with me was made clear.
The message I received: Isaac is a sovereign entity, doing good work. You are a sovereign entity, doing good work. The Universe provides for the both of you, and always has (I knew this to be true, but had let fear dictate me up to this point.) All the while this was happening my body was being filled with what felt like a thousand cups of coffee, or the strongest stimulant known to humankind. I began to laugh, I began to cry, I began to babble...all the while driving to our shop in the dead of winter.
Then the name of this being was made known to me, and what it was. Here’s where I have a truly hard time sharing with people: the being that was coming through to me was an angel and he gave me a name I’d never heard before.
It sounded like Gav’re’al.
This initially confused me as up to this point I couldn’t say I believed in angels. I mean, my mind and spiritual horizons were being expanded daily, but I couldn’t say that I believed in them, and I guess I can’t say I disbelieved in them. I grew up with a loathing for the Church and what it did to people: controlling people through fear of eternal damnation, the Catholic Church abuse scandal, me being gay and being taught that I was an abomination...all of it caused me to have great distaste for Judaic organizations.
I had no experience with angels, knew some of the major archangels names, but aside from that, knew nothing. Later I found out I was given the ancient name of the angel we now know as Gabriel.
Up to this point Isaac had been working in a course of magical and ceremonial practice that invoked a lot of angelic energy. While I wouldn’t outright dismiss his work and experiences as inauthentic, they weren’t my experiences and I’m very much a person who has to see or feel to believe.
Not only was I seeing, I was feeling, I was experiencing something like I’d never felt before. This being let me know that it was much older than mankind itself, much older than civilization or any religion that might mention them. In fact, angels are mentioned in every major world religion, and as I’ve come to understand them, they’re agents of balance in the Universe, working in areas of creation and destruction, each with their own agenda.
By the time I pulled up to the shop and parked it was dark, and I was bawling. I mean, literally sobbing and crying so hard my body was shaking, but it wasn’t from sadness. It was from the pure power of the experience I was undergoing. Through all of these tears I waited to see Isaac’s client exit the shop and as soon as they were out of the immediate area I ran into the shop. I ran in as Isaac was closing up and locking the doors. I pushed him back into the shop, grabbed his hands, and told him to shut up.
I told him that he had to shut up, that I had to get this out, that I had to tell him everything that was passed onto me. I told him he was a sovereign entity, doing what “someone” considered good work, and that I had nothing to do with how he charged for his services from that day forward. If he wanted to spend 3 days with a client and only charge them $10, I would be ecstatic and happy for that scenario. He could absolutely work in any way he sees fit, as I would, and I wouldn’t say or do anything about it.
All of this was coming out in a rush of gibberish. It still felt like I was having electricity or the world’s strongest stimulant rush through me. I held his hands and was shaking. I held his hands and was crying. I felt pushed to my absolute limit, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
Isaac didn’t blink an eye, didn’t question my experience, and immediately went into healer mode. He knew I’d been a skeptic of the esoteric and metaphysical world most of my life, and especially anything Christian-based. He stripped my shirt off and laid me on the floor of our shop, which was a concrete floor covered in carpet as we were in the basement. He immediately started doing energy work on me, trying to ground whatever high vibration energy this was going through me. The entire time this was happening I was gibbering away, crying, laughing, my eyes rolling in the back of my head, and I kept hearing him say “Come back to me, come back to me.”
Whatever happened to me caused a muscle in my right pectoral to clench up. It felt like I had an egg sitting under the skin of my right breast, and I can remember asking him to just push down on it to relieve some of the pressure. It eventually went away, but about a week later and only thanks to a wonderful massage therapist who came out of retirement to do work on me, someone who didn’t bat an eye at my story and knew exactly how to fix it. She dug into my left side with her fingers, releasing the tension in my right pectoral. I still don’t know how she did it. What I do know is that my strength level, my vitality, was stronger than I ever knew - I was “told” by this being that if I weren’t as strong as I was this experience would have killed me.
Isaac got me to the point where I could manage to stand up and walk around, but this energy was still coursing through me. We had to get home as our son was probably wondering where we were, and I insisted on driving. I needed to be occupied. I couldn’t bear the thought of sitting in the passenger seat, I had to be doing something, I had to be engaged. And for all of that, I was still gibbering, still yipping, still laughing, still crying and my body was so tense that for most of the drive my body wasn’t bent at the waist. My feet were on the floor, directing the gas and brake pedals as needed, but I was rigid as a board.
If you’ve ever seen footage of apparently possessed people, with their eyes rolling in the back of their head, yipping and head rolling, that was me.
That was me.
We arrived home and I had started to calm down. It’s interesting - at the point that this experience began for me as I was driving up the driveway, it eased as soon as I passed that point coming down. I was a little wired and excited by the time I got in the house but nothing that our son wouldn’t see as abnormal.
And yet, this story doesn’t end there. Imagine being faced with something of this extent, having your worldview shaken to the core, having all of your preconceived notions thrown out the window. During this spell of mine I was made aware of all sorts of other information, about myself, about my purpose, about my ancestry, that I can’t share here...but all of it blew my mind as much as the experience itself did.
But what began to frighten me most was this thought: if beings like angels were real, doesn’t that mean the opposite of them would also be real? That frightened me greatly. The idea of doing our work, our good work, and having it attract negative entities that wouldn’t like what we were doing, frightened me like nothing I’d ever been frightened of before. Isaac was smart in the way he told me to not even think about that, to not even entertain that thought.
In the midst of all this, I had a woman reach out to me for a reading. What was peculiar is that she lived in the far reaches of northern Canada. She was Mexican, a Catholic, and we had no mutual friends and she had no friends who had seen me before (I asked.) She was nowhere in the area where I’d been advertising on Facebook, so I asked her the question I ask of pretty much everyone: how did she hear of me?
She then told me that my face kept popping up on her Facebook. Over and over again until she decided to reach out to me for a reading. She had a sad story - a single mom of a baby, her husband moved her to Canada from Mexico and left her shortly after her baby was born. Our reading was wonderful and as always, exactly what she needed, with her grandmother coming through telling her to come home, back to Mexico. I was honored to give her the guidance and healing that she needed at that moment.
Mystified as to how she found me, I ended our video chat and was about to close out my web browser when I saw something on her Facebook profile. It was a single phrase in her Bio section, the area on your Facebook profile where you can describe yourself, however you wish. Her bio read like this: “The enemy cannot kill that which God has crowned.”
I was floored, and it was exactly what I needed to hear, exactly when I needed to hear it. I would never presume to say that Isaac and I have been “crowned by God,” and I still don’t believe in God as part of the Christian doctrine. I have another idea of our Great Creator that is mine alone, but this floored me, and I immediately shared it with Isaac.
I will say with complete humility that our work together has been sanctioned by higher powers that I don’t quite understand, and probably will never understand. This experience meant so much to me, so much to us, that earlier this summer we both got matching tattoos of that phrase, translated into Latin:
Hostes non occidere quod Deus coronavit.
Other pieces began to line up for me as I looked through the lense of retrospection: check my other blogs for the Daniel Fast I went on. I started that fast on Monday, January 14th, the day after this experience and as you’d read in those blogs, had been planning for it for some time. A coincidence - or synchronicity, if you will - is that Gabriel is mentioned only a few times in the Bible, and one of those times was when he appeared to Daniel, of whom I was fasting for.
Up to that point, over the past couple weeks prior to this experience, I’d been having Catholics come see me in droves. This confused me as it was literally every other client I had, and I was under the impression that mediums and psychics were frowned upon by the Church. I came to understand these wonderful people who practiced a religion I didn’t understand - and one that I came to despise - were coming to me to better expand my horizons.
I will leave you with this: please don’t take my experience and start to worship angels. While angels do exist and I have felt them around certain clients before, one must be careful to whom and what you venerate. There are many parasitic and negative energies out there that love to parade as angels, and I’d hate to have you attract one of them to you. Just know they are agents of balance in our Universe, with agendas of creation and destruction that we can’t understand, not fully.
So please, take my experience and learn from it, and hold onto whatever faith you may have, whether Christian-based or not. Know that pieces on this grand chessboard of life are being moved around by forces greater than us all, and there’s not much we can do about it, if anything at all.
I am honored to walk this path and am blessed to know that I am not walking it alone.
Thank you for reading.